The opinions expressed in this article are the author’s own and do not necessarily reflect the view of the American Council of Hypnotist Examiners.

by Katherine Zimmerman

I’ve been working with a delightful young woman recently. Although she just turned 30, she is still living at home for a variety of reasons, mostly financial. As you can imagine, it’s hard to experience life as a grown up when you’re still living with your parents.

“T” reported that she was being overly cautious, with fear popping up whenever she met new people and tried doing new things. Her question was, does it belong to me? Why is it there, and can I transform it to excitement? After all, the physical sensation is the same or at least, similar.

Although the fear has been with her for her whole life, she just realized it recently. Her analytical side says, “I have to be safe”.

I always ask why it’s important to resolve this issue now. “T” says it holds her back from experiencing new things, doing things on her own, and living life as a whole human being. As soon as she expressed that she added that something felt “dangerous” and she should stay home which inhibits her growth.

This realization hit “T” during grief counseling after one of her grandmothers died. “T” wants her mom to just listen but because her mom is a “fixer” that doesn’t happen.

Her initial goal was to simply experience hypnosis. As we all know, we can accomplish much more even in an initial session. “T” is all about metaphors so I used a process which allowed her to release bags of negative experiences, beliefs, thoughts, trauma, etc.

She had an “aha” between sessions and realized that her fear came from her mom’s negative attitude about life. She felt less anxious about going out and doing new things, especially doing them alone. She’s smiling at strangers more and is less afraid of strange men. There’s a weight off her shoulders.

Her next goal was to simply “go deeper.” Even though she responds well to metaphors, the second session wasn’t as effective as we’d hoped. She had trouble getting into the process. It happens.

Session 3, “T” reported she was feeling “stuffed” at home with family and was getting triggered. (There’s a reason children move out when they do) She was falling back into old patterns and thinking she was incompetent and lazy. Her mom’s way of doing things doesn’t make sense to “T” as she processes life very differently. She is slow and steady, needing time to think about her next step. For example, “T” spent two years deciding on a career path. Her mom, on the other hand, is decisive and quick to take action.

We invited in a wounded part that needed a voice, that really needed to speak. Because my clients’ wounded parts are most from childhood, imagine our surprise when an ageless part showed up. It was a very productive session.

Session 4 progress: “T” is giving more space to herself. The ageless part that she’d been ignoring had been popping up, giving her a new perspective.

We removed the energetic cords during this session. She had four… the grandmother who’d died, her mom and her living grandmother and her brother. Each cord looked and felt different, and some were easier to release than others.

Here’s the exciting part (at least for me) in session 5 “T” told me how impactful the cord removal was. Often our loved ones feel a shift when we remove their cord. “T’s” grandmother noticed right away improving their relationship, her mom– no change. Good news: “T” is now less annoyed by her mom.

Reclaiming her personal power was the approach this session. Afterward she felt “stronger”. Then I asked her to imagine a symbol representing the old fear and send love to it. Her symbol was a black rose which dissolved instantly when the love was delivered.

Honestly, I have clients who make progress much more quickly than this young lady. However, then I remember that her way is to be slow and steady. And there it is… she needs to do it “her way.”

Katherine Zimmerman is an internationally-known author and speaker, Certified Clinical Hypnotherapist, and Director of the California Hypnotherapy Academy. Since 1989, she has taught classes on self-hypnosis, EFT, and other related subjects, along with doing presentations on hypnotherapy at professional conferences nationwide.